Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Woke up backwards on a recliner
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize