I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Green mimosas i think yes
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize