How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
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No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
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