Capitaan dildo arrescate!
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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