Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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