no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Can you bring me the toilet please
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
