My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Randomize
