I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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