How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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