When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
She said her name was "party"
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
