Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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