I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
