TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
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You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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