The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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