using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
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