Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
