I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
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