I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize