oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Is this like a preordered booty call?
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize