I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Too much gin, very little bucket
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
