this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
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I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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