maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Randomize
