it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Randomize
