I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I cut my penus on the lid.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night