One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
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