i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
I forgot how hot balto sounded
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Randomize
