Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
