Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
