break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
