butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
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