Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
