ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Randomize