Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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