it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
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