no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
