you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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