So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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