Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
