You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
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I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
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