I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
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