What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Randomize
