Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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