so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
