My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize