There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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