What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
