Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
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