I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
