he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Randomize
