Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize
